Officials from Tri-County Regional Planning and the City of Peoria will announce today that all flights from Peoria will no longer connect directly to Chicago and other major hubs. Instead, Peoria will have just one airline that will provide shuttle service to the Central Illinois Regional Airport in Bloomington, Illinois. 
From there, travelers can transfer to a major airline to reach hub cities.
“Bloomington is really where Peoria’s travelers want to go,” said Terry Kohlbuss, the executive director of the Tri-County Regional Planning Commission. “We’ve always considered Chicago a secondary destination.”
When asked why the Peoria area would seemingly be taking a step backwards given that no airlines had announced any plans to cut direct service to Peoria, Mayor Jim Ardis replied, “It’s part of our long-term goal of having all transportation options pass through the Bloomington-Normal area first.”
Secretary of Transportation Ray LaHood agreed. “We started many years ago with the interstate highways and successfully got them concentrated in the Twin Cities. Peorians are already dependent on Normal for passenger rail service. Air service is the next logical step in the process.”
The final step, said Kohlbuss, will be to reroute the Illinois River away from Peoria and through the twin cities where it can provide a natural boundary between Bloomington and Normal. But he added that it will “probably be several years” before the state is able to afford that project.
April Fool!
I am an idiot and should stay home from work today, lest I get sold another more dangerous prank.
The worse part is I could really see them doing something this stupid.
You had me at Ray LaHood!!
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are a certifiable RAT!
Given the way things are going in Peoria I almost fell for this!
How many months have you been waiting to do this CJ?
You got me right up until the last paragraph.
Me too until you made the statement about the Illinois Waterway. Then I knew you were tipping the milk once too often. Can you fathom how many people would really believe this?
Tom: Just thought of it last night, after reading this post.
Billy & SD: Isn’t it sad that it sounded at all believable up to that point? I put the last paragraph in there just so no one would panic. 🙂
Very good – I believed every word up until the last paragraph.
Yep. I’m with Billy and Emerge. Til the re-routing of the river, it all sounded JUST like something that might happen around here! Nicely played, CJ.
LOL! love it!
Great. Of course, now that you’ve brought it up as a possibility….
Good one, C. J.
BWA-HA-HA-HA!!! My favorite touch was the maps… You know, for those of us who are VISUAL learners. 🙂
But CJ, you forgot to show all of those connections that are available at Bloomington! I sense some bias 🙂
http://www.pjstar.com/business/x1076644887/Developer-Gary-Matthews-found-his-niche-after-leaving-home-at-an-early-age?img=2
Give me a break. I am sure this story has nothing to do getting some sympathy for the election…..JMJ
Paul you stole my thunder. I just was going to post that on my blog.
And I see he learned at the feet of David Joseph. That explains a lot.